


Drowning in Hydrangeas

by demonchick25



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Feels, Hanahaki Disease, M/M, One-Sided Attraction, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-01
Updated: 2017-05-01
Packaged: 2018-10-26 10:25:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,967
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10784955
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/demonchick25/pseuds/demonchick25
Summary: It was a beautiful shining and shining moment. The moment when someone realizes they’re in love. For that moment the world seems to be at peace and nothing can go wrong. Sometimes, though, that moment doesn’t last. Sometimes they’ll get a taste of that beautiful feeling, but they’ll find themselves coughing up flower petals.This was the kind of moment Futakuchi was experiencing.





	Drowning in Hydrangeas

_It was a beautiful shining and shining moment. The moment when someone realizes they’re in love. For that moment the world seems to be at peace and nothing can go wrong. Sometimes, though, that moment doesn’t last. Sometimes they’ll get a taste of that beautiful feeling, but they’ll find themselves coughing up flower petals._

This was the kind of moment Futakuchi was experiencing. Horror colored his features as he stared down at the blue and purple petals in his hand. The beauty in them mocked the darkened painful truth of what this meant. He was in love, but his love was not returned. The words didn’t have to be spoken, the person never had to know the pain they were causing. It was sick. Damn this disease, damn his weak heart, and damn Kamasaki Yasushi. It would be so easy to blame him, but no, Futakuchi couldn’t do it. He couldn’t blame the person he loved for his suffering.

Standing outside the school gate, a few people stared as they passed, whispering to each other. He hated it. He hated that his pain was on public display. He dropped the petals and made his way to the club room. It was a blessing that the third years had retired. He didn’t think he’d be able to contain the cough if he were spending the time with Kamasaki. He wanted to hide this. He wanted to forget it. He wanted to go back to the day before, when everything was just normal.

“Futakuchi-senpai! You’re late!” Koganegawa shouted at the first sight of the captain. “Where were you?”

“Shut up!” Futakuchi snapped, causing the younger to recoil. This earned a sharp stare from Aone.

—

Once practice ended and it was time to get ready for class. Behind the gym, alone, Futakuchi was doubled over, petals piling on the ground at his feet. He fell to his knees, gasping for breath as a gust of wind carried the petals away.

“No.” Tears streamed down his cheeks. Choking on the single word, the petals stuck to his wet face. He cried and cursed his fate.

—

The volleyball club third years were too late to drop in on practice. Laughing and chatting they were about to head into the school building when the wind brought flower petals to their feet.

“What’s this?” Moniwa bend down to examine the petals. “Hydrangea petals? Strange.”

“Yeah, they aren’t even in season.” Sasaya commented. “Wonder where they came from.”

“It’s gotta be a case of Hanahaki, right?” Kamasaki crossed his arms. “No other reasonable explanation.”

“That’s awful. Should we find them and see if they need help?” Moniwa suggested, looking around for the source. “Over there!” He pointed to the gym.

The three rushed over. The they rounded they corner they hadn’t expected to see their kouhai suffering this fate. They were silent a moment, pure shock shutting them up. Futakuchi hadn’t noticed them.

“Futakuchi?” Moniwa kneeled beside him.

Futakuchi froze, forgetting to breathe for just a moment. He slowly looked up to the familiar faces. Eyes red and face plastered with petals. There was no wayne could pretend nothing was wrong. Looking past Moniwa to Kamasaki he started to cough again. He couldn’t catch his breath. He wanted to tell them to leave him, to just go away.

“W-we should get him to the nurse.” Moniwa stood, a slight panic in his voice.

“Got it.” Kamasaki easily scooped the younger up into his arms. Futakuchi curled into his chest, coughing harder. Unable to draw a proper breath, he soon passed out on they way.

—

It was nearly two hours before Futakuchi woke up, oxygen tube in his nose. He looked around, not too sure where he was. Slowly, he sat up and pulled the tube out. He spoke with the nurse and was allowed to go to class. He rushed to change and get to class. All eyes were on him as soon as the for opened. It made him sick.

He was distracted though the lesson. His thoughts wandered as he tried to hold back the coughing. He wondered what would happen now. Well, there was only two choices really. Surgery to remove the flowers, but that came at a cost. Not just a financial cost, but the loss of the love felt. With as much pain as he was in between the heartbreak and invasion of his lungs, did he really want to forget it all? Of course, the alternative was to let the disease kill him. What was right to do?

Before he knew it, it was lunch time. He laid his head down on the desk, not realizing how warm his face had gotten until it touched the cool surface. He needed to get up, go cough up the build up in the back of his throat. He didn’t move though, closing his eyes. He opened them again when the light was blocked out. He didn’t bother to look up, it could only be Aone. Anyone else would have been talking by now.

“What?” He strained to speak, biting back a coughing fit. “I’m fine. I wasn’t feeling well so I rested in the nurse’s office.” He tried to wave him away.

“You should go home.” Aone’s words were blunt, as they always seemed to be.

“I said I’m fine.”

“You’re not.”

“I’m fi-“ Futakuchi had slammed his fists on the desk as he sat up, but his words were cut off. He coughed and choked, all the petals he held back spilling over his desk. The entire room fell silent, everyone’s attention was drawn to him again. They silence gave way to whispers and chatter. It was embarrassing. Everyone now knew what pain he was going through. He felt as if they were all mocking him. Laughing at his fate. He collapsed back down onto his desk, holding back his tears.

Aone rested a hand on his friend’s back, hoping it would offer some comfort. He had no words to offer, words were never his strong suit. Still, he wanted to help, but how?

—

They school day drew to a close, everyone heading off for club activities. When Futakuchi arrived at the club room, Aone blocked his path inside. They stared each other down, neither willing to move away.

“Go home.” Aone pointed in the direction of the school gate.

“I’m not going anywhere.” Futakuchi protested.

Aone frowned intensely. It took a minuet or two but finally he conceded and stepped aside. This wasn’t the end, though. He headed into the school building to find the third years in their classroom. He gave a small bow in greeting before walking into the room.

“Aone, is something wrong?” Moniwa asked, receiving only a nod in response. “It’s about Futakuchi, isn’t it?” He continued, getting another affirmative response.

“He is sick, but he won’t go home.” Aone’s concern was clear, even if he didn’t articulate it well.

“We’ll see what we can do.” Moniwa assured with a smile. “Go on back to practice, we’ll be right there. After another polite bow, Aone left.

Not long after, the three rushed down to the volleyball gym. They barged in without warning, still greeted kindly by various club members. To their eyes, Futakuchi looked weak and worn. They were sure everyone could see it.

“Futakuchi, what the hell do you think you’re doing?” Kamasaki was the first to speak up, matching over to him.

Uncharacteristically, Futakuchi backed away. His hands quickly covered his mouth, looking almost like he may vomit. He tried desperately to face back the petals rising in his throat. His back hit the wall, seconds later Kamasaki was right in his face demanding explanation. It was all too much, Futakuchi slid down to the floor. He couldn’t contain the cough or the resulting spew of petals. Again, everyone stopped and went quiet, only the sounds of a few balls dropping to the floor were heard.

“K-Kamasaki! I don’t think that was the best approach.” Moniwa rushed over, Sasaya not far behind. “Futakuchi, we’re just worried about you. Please, let us help.”

“You can’t help! No one can help.” Futakuchi snapped back, short of breath.

“Stop being a stubborn bastard!” Kamasaki’s concern showed as anger. He wasn’t letting this go. “You can get help, so why don’t you?”

“I don’t want the surgery.”

“Why not? Do you want to die?”

“Of course not.”

“So why?!”

“I…” Futakuchi wondered how. to put it into words. “I don’t want to forget. I don’t want to lose that feeling of being in love. As much as it’s hurting me now, it was something amazing I don’t want to forget.” He was choking on the words, sputtering coughs rained petals onto his legs.

Kamasaki fell silent again. The gym was quiet. Finally, the coach blew the whistle to get everyone to resume practice.

—

As the next few days passed, Futakuchi’s condition worsened. He stopped participating in practice and most of his classes. He saw doctors, keeping tabs on the progression of the disease. He refused surgery at every turn. He was given medication to ease his pain and lessen the cough, just to make him more comfortable. Finally, the moment he was dreading, the doctor told him that he probably wouldn’t make it through the night.

At this point, there was only one thing he wanted. He wanted to spend his last night with Kamasaki. He wanted to be close, to have his last fantasy of his love. He texted with shaking hands.

_To: Kamasaki_   
_Subject: [none]_   
_Message:_   
_Hey. Can you come over tonight?_

_[sent]_

—

Kamasaki was at home alone. It was a Tuesday night, so there was nothing going on. When his phone beeped, he quickly pulled up the new message. He frowned. He had a suspicion of what this meant. He was sure this was the last time he’d get to see Futakuchi. He had to go.

_To: Futakuchi_   
_Subject: [none]_   
_Message:_   
_Sure. On my way._

_[sent]_

—

Not long after the response, Futakuchi heard the knock at the door. His heart was racing as he rushed over to the door. He greeted his guest and let him inside. He was honestly exhausted from just that.

“Thank you for coming.” His voice was soft

“How could I say no?” Kamasaki looked around, surprised there was no one else around. “Is no one else coming…?”

“I didn’t ask anyone else. Just you.” Futakuchi’s face reddened, suddenly nervous. “It’s my last night. This is what I wanted.”

“Oh… ok.” Kamasaki pretended not to notice the way his face turned red. He pretended Futakuchi’s feelings weren’t obvious. He pretended he didn’t know he was the cause of all this.

They spent the next few hours on the couch. Futakuchi leaning on Kamasaki’s shoulder, blaming his weakness. They talked and laughed, as if nothing was wrong. It put Futakuchi at ease, not being forced to dwell on the inevitable. He was somewhat bold in his actions and his need for physical contact. Despite his pain, despite knowing that death was on his heels, he smiled.

It was two in the morning before it started. Futakuchi was coughing and gasping for breath. He clung tight to Kamasaki. This was the end, he could feel it. Petals and even whole flowers are cascading from his mouth. Kamasaki’s arms wrapped around him to hold him steady. With the last of his strength, he pulled himself up to place a fleeting kiss on Kamasaki’s lips. He tried to speak, but it was impossible.

That final moment seemed to last an eternity. It was still just a moment, though. Futakuchi’s body fell limp in Kamasaki’s arms. Kamasaki laid him down gently on the couch. The beautiful blue/purple hydrangeas grew, blooming from the boy’s mouth. Beautiful, thriving flowers. Kamasaki’s favorite flowers, in his favorite color.

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first time writing most of these characters, I hope you enjoyed the pain


End file.
